“God, you’re such a safe and powerful place to find refuge! You’re a proven help in time of trouble— more than enough and always available whenever I need you.”
Psalms 46:1 TPT
H.A.L.T.= Hungry Angry Lonely Tired you’re most susceptible to the devils attack ~ My Mom
I yelled at my kids today... I mean full on crazed mom yelling at a 2 and 3-year-old all while my 9-month-old is screaming crying in his play-pen. Oh, by the way, I happened to yell at the same children Sunday and Monday; and my husband got some of the crazed action of me yelling at him Sunday RIGHT after church!! Might I add it’s just Tuesday, good grief.
What kind of mom and wife am I for Pete’s sake? I mean goodness I couldn’t let the message from the pastor sink in and take hold before I lose my patience with everyone. All morning I’ve replayed the broken record of how I need to get up earlier try harder and then the pressure won’t seem so great and I’ll do better. As the record was just about to hit repeat for the 5th time I drug myself and broken spirit to the table where instead of the oatmeal my 3-year-old requested we are eating peanut butter and jelly with chips and cheese for breakfast; I sat down with my head hung low.
Just a few minutes before I took my seat I’d shouted that mom was in time out and not to talk to me. I lifted my head and looked around the table into 6 big brown eyes and apologized for mommy losing her patience and always running behind. And without missing a beat in all sincerity my oldest son said: “mom that’s okay”. I responded, “son thank you but it’s not mom knows better and shouldn’t yell at you guys”. He repeated himself with the same 3-year-old conviction and love “mom it’s okay”.
Mom didn’t feel like it was in the moment but it really was. It can be hard to remember that our fickle feelings can lead us astray and no matter how hard we try the enemy is always looking for the perfect time to point out our shortcomings. He waits until you’ve had zero sleep because you’ve been up all night with a crying baby, ailing parent or spouse and just when you’re about to drift off to sleep or take a break, or say no to that friend's invitation so that you can have some “me time” to reset he inserts his coins of lies into the jukebox of regret and self-deprecation.
It’s at this moment we have a choice to decide if we are going to patronize a place in our minds with the devil where the service is so disgusting that the board of health could shut it down and the music is lousy. Or if we will intentionally get up and leave and meet the lover of our soul who has prepared a great place that only leaves us full, refreshed and satisfied.
After hearing my son tell me it was okay, I sensed the Holy Spirit telling me the same thing, that I didn’t have to stay there I could actually “dine and dash” Jesus had already paid the cost. I’d taken in enough garbage that was making me sick and He wanted to heal my broken spirit and refill me so I could work and love through Him despite my shortcomings.
Oh Lord, but for your grace. I’d be lost if it weren’t for your grace. Thank you for being merciful, loving, compassionate, and forgiving. Thank you for renewing my mind and spirit. Amen
Popular posts from this blog
“You will say the wrong thing if you talk too much— so be sensible and watch what you say." Proverbs 10:19 CEV “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”. I remember singing that as a child when someone would say something mean to me. It was supposed to be a way to act as if what was said couldn’t hurt my feelings. But sometimes words just stick. No matter how old we are we have the potential to carry the scars from words that were spoken to us. Truthfully, words can and DO much harm. Sometimes, what is being said was intentionally malicious and other times it could have been true but it was said without love. Then there are times when what’s said is spoken flippantly because the person is “just talking”. If we’re honest we can see ourselves in one if not all of these scenarios as well as on the receiving end. I can remember 2 instances in particular in my adult life that caused private heartache and questioning if I had s
“So Noah went out, and his wife and his sons and their wives with him [after being in the ark one year and ten days]. Every animal, every crawling thing, every bird—and whatever moves on the land—went out by families (types, groupings) from the ark.” GENESIS 8:18-19 AMP “The Lord promised to do many good things for Israel, and he kept his promise every time.” Joshua 21:45 CEV I felt like I was holding my breath waiting for the lines to come up on pregnancy test I’d just gotten from Walmart. I was anxious so I got the one you could get an early result. I mean I had all the symptoms and just needed to be sure I couldn’t wait another 9 days. I anxiously got to day 6 and figured I’m gonna go ahead and take the test the pregnancy levels HAVE got to be high enough by now. For the sake of laughter at my foolishness, the test said: “5 days earlier”... NOT 6! As I sat alone waiting, the Holy Spirit said: “just wait”. Of course, I didn’t, I drank 32 ounces of water so I
“Jesus answered, “The Scriptures say: ‘No one can live only on food. People need every word that God has spoken.’ ”” Matthew 4:4 CEV During the holidays we tend to “snack” or sampling as I like to think of it. You know how we do; “ I’ll try a little of this and some of that and a tiny piece of this dessert and a small slice of that pie, oh just a spoonful of that dip too because so and so made it and they make it so well. You’ve been waiting all year for them to bring their one small crockpot full of it. Oh, maybe that’s just me; I’m willing to bet all the pennies at the bottom of my purse that the above scenario isn’t applicable to just me. We have all done it and later regret it. Sometimes we snack in an effort to” portion control” but still end up overeating because snacking or sampling doesn’t equate to being full... no matter how much you eat. Meriam Webster’s dictionary defines snack as a light meal: food eaten between meals. The Urban dictionary